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Hi everyone! It's been awhile. This post is a little important so I have a feeling im going to be making it a little long... Also, I'm doing it from my phone. So, there may be weird typos.

If you don't wanna read the whole thing here's a basic summary:
I left DA because of Internet hate which brought down my confidence; I got a lot of hate the same day I found out my grandfather died which really made it worse, I planned on coming back the beginning of January but I was hospitalized because of a bowel obstruction and I am still currently in the hospital and plan to come back mid February. Also I feel like shit.

Long version: I guess I'll start... With why I left. It's a really complex reason and I really hope everyone will understand, but I think there might be some people who just won't. And by that I mean, I am aware I have a handfull of followers who might feel neutral about my art rather than full out liking it. Or maybe I'm just talking about the people who don't really like my art at all.

What I'm specifically talking about is the people on artist-confessions. Oh yes... That blog. How do I even start with this. I feel sad for the people pinpointed on that blog. Im amazed just how many people really feel that way about my art. Not because I believe everyone should like my art or anything, but, just how passionate people are about mere HATING. You guys just love the drama. You guys just really love the trolling. I'm just flabbergasted that you really have nothing better to do, sometimes. It's like, whoa. All i do is make art, and some people treat it like... Not... That.

All that being said, I still take some of my trolls to heart. Some people come to back me up like "oh they're just jealous!" or "theyre just trolls and have nothing better to do!" and that could be true for some people, but! Some of the trolls do have some worthy things to say about my art. Like, the thing is, they insult my art, but they're right. I have a lot of problems with my art. I'm very aware of it. And a lot of the things that AC tackles, (and by AC I mean the confessions themselves, plus the anon comment section) I take it all to heart. I take all my critiques to heart, and consider them all, even if theyre worded rudely.

Now that's where my problem lies eith AC. Some people do give good well rounded critiques. Others, do, but are just complete, fucking assholes about it.
Here's the difference.
"The problem with Oceans art is her shading, she doesn't have a definitive light source, and her colors are too bright."
"Ocean doesn't know how to do light sources, her shading is shit and the colors hurt my eyes I can't even look at them."

Though, I know some people would rather say the second example than the first. And that's part of the reason why I left DA.

Mid-December, I got a confession posted on that blog. Comments were the usual. The difference between this confession and the others I've gotten is that this confession was posted just when I had found out my grandfather died.

I had a lot f bad comments coming to me that day while I was dealing with my grandfathers passing. Usually I don't let those confessions hurt me too too bad, but this one kicked me down and I just couldn't feel better. I didn't want to draw at all. I became extremely self consious of my drawings, I thought everything I produced looked like absolute utter crap. Which is why I left. I didn't feel confident in anyone seeing any of my art anymore. I felt embarrassed of it, I felt like it was crappy and there were too many mistakes and I wasn't proud of it at all, and I didnt want anyone to see it. That's what AC did to me.

Drawing was supposed to be fun, and for a short while last moth, the Internet killed it for me. You can call me butthurt. But I don't think I really care. Im very, very human. And I have dozens of thousands people watching me and what I do and what I write and my opinions and my art -- and outside the Internet, I'm so so average, I am such a regular person just like anybody. So to have my every move practically just watched and judged nonstop id extremely stressful. When someones rude to me, I try to play it cool. Because of you lash out, you're a bitch. But then I'd you're sad about Internet hate, you're butthurt. You can't win this.  Must be nice to be anon. I'd like to see you try this without your grey face and 20,000+ watching and judging everything you say or do.

I'd just like to add I'm aware that AC has a blacklist. I've considered adding myself, but I'm not sure. /sigh/ I mean;; if I add myself, I'm "a pussy" or I "can't take critiques", if not, I get a lot of hate. I am stuck between as rock and a hard place.
And you know, to be honest, I was never actually bothered by the confessions themselves, most of them are pretty well rounded, it's just the anoncomments that just get stupid. Though a the same time I will say, I don't understand AC, I don't get why the confessor just comes to me, instead of plastering on the tabloids. It's immature IMO.

As for my actual art! I'm very aware of aaaaall of the problems it has. I'm working really hard to find a spot(a style) I can be proud of and enjoy, and have it be realistically correct. The thing I ask for from people, I think, is patience. Or some slack. My art isn't going to change over night. The problem with it, is that I've been drawing for about a decade, and I've been drawing - incorrectly. By that I mean.... One of my biggest problems is my shading. I was shading every article (skin, hair, clothes) with its own light source, rather than just giving the whole body s hard light source. And then of course there's my anatomy. I've been teaching myself that wrong, too. So I'm trying to relearn. Anatomy is hard, man. Cut me some slack if I can't perfect it in even a year.

So that's my art life. I had been having a pretty hectic personal life as well. I won't go into too much detail, but I do know this is something I want to share.
Two years ago, I met someone (not Ichi). My relationship eith this person turned.... Very confusing... This boy, had some problems I couldn't handle, I wanted to get out of it, but he was a little obsessive, a little manipulative, and I might even say it was a bit of an abusive relationship. But I don't hate him. I had feelings for him once, and I feel very sad for him, to know that he has certain anger, things like that, that he can't control. That went on for two years. I am finally getting out of it now. But I think it really took a toll on my art and Internet life because it was a big thing I was worrying about. So that's another thing I am finally getting out of the way.

Fast forward to present day.
It's really sad just how much bad luck I have. I originally planned to come back to DA this month, however, two weeks ago I was hospitalized and I've underwent two surgeries and intensive care and healing.

Three years ago, I got my appendix removed. It was a worse-than-usual-case, and I needed a portion of my bowels removed. Unfortunately, the piece of shit doctor I had sewed my bowels up into a twist. It took three years for my bowels to finally twist. It twisted in two spots. The official name for this is called s bowel obstruction. When I originally went in, I thought j had food poisoning. If only it just could've been that.

I underwent two surgeries. One to un-twist my bowels. The second was to remove my damaged bowels. I wasn't able to eat for over a week. I've been hooked up to nutrients and antibiotics for two weeks. I had a catheter in for a week and a half. Walking has been very difficult. I can't stand up straight. For the first week my catheter was plugged so my body was retaining so much water - I probably gained 30 pounds in my legs. It was absolutely disgusting. It really wasn't nice. And I had a really bad nurse too (for people following my tumblr you know the details of all that) plus I have this terrible trailer trash neighbor. God. I hate her. I've never been able to say I hate anyone before. But I hate this girl. She stayed up so loud on the phone bitching (she does this every day, about people stealing her "gold chains" idek), which cause complaints, and now nobody can stay late anymore. So my mom isn't able to stay late anymore, or my boyfriend. I hate this bitch. I hate her.

As for my actual stay here, I'm not going to lie, this is the worst thing I've ever been through in my life. Organ surgeries are te worst, especially when it's part of your digestive system.... Everything is so uncomfortable, I'm in so much pain every day, I'm so so depressed. My recovery is going so, so slow.

Above all, this is around the tenth time I've done this.
This isn't something I talk about often, but I have had many health problems throughout my life. I haven't gone three years, since the day I've been born, without going through surgeries. I've had four pacemaker surgeries, one open heart surgery, two lymph node removals (two because the doctor took out the wrong one first), my appendix surgery, and now this one, because my last doctor fucked up. I truly have the worst luck. When I was first admitted here, I didn't care about anything anymore. I have gone through this so many times I just didn't care; I think I was at the point where I'd rather die than go through another intensive recovery.

However, I've been here two weeks, and I'm recovering... Slowly. I've been crying every day and I've been really depressed but, I am still recovering. I guess I'm thankful this all happened before con season. I'll be all healed before that rolls around. And also,  Ichi and my mom have been here every day helping me. I don't think I could have gone through this without them. Especially Ichi (my boyfriend). He's my angel. ;/////;

So that's where I am at right now. I've been going through a lot. v@' I really hope that I can get back to posting art regularly mid-late February. I miss being online and posting art for you guys and Livestreaming and everything. I'll never leave DA, so, no worries about that. I might take my breaks, but I'll never leave. I have too many people who look up to me, dear god, that's right!!!;;; when I left, I couldn't believe the feedback. Really, thank you guys. You all keep me going so much. And once I'm better and shit, I'll be back making more art! ;7;

Speaking of which, if you are a new follower, I have a yearly tradition where I do a request Livestream during the new year. Unfortunately I haven't been able to because of my hospitalization, but I still plan on it. :)

Thank you all for waiting, and reading, and etc. despite I get hate here and there, it's really all worth it for the amount of love I get in return. I couldn't have asked for better .... Fans. Followers? I really hate using the word "fans". e_e but yeah I couldn't ask for better ones!! I love you! ;/////;

I guess I'll see you all when I see you. Which I hope is soon. Thank you do much always. You guys really do make me feel like a million bucks.


More info coming soon.

  • Listening to: TYRONE
Add a Comment:
a1993 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2013
it explains why you havent been on, is that why i cant see your pictures when i look at your gallery? you got rid of them all? (ive been off DA for a while too) i really did like your artwork and it really does suck about those internet trolls
animelondon Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2013
Honestly your artwork is wonderful. If 'some' people don't then they should just move onto to something they DO like.

As for bowel surgery, I know the feeling all too well. I had it though it was because of family history of bowel cancer... when in doubt, snip it out. No cancer but the scare didn't just effect me but all my nephews, neices, sisters and brother who had cancer. Thankfully he pulled trough treatment but my UNlucky break may have well saved his life. Of all things, I hated the most was bowel prep. :P

Enough about me. Oceanchan... don't give up drawing. I made that mistake years ago and it still is a mistake. I could say something cliche but I won't. Recover and heal and most importantly, come back.
iDenicexM Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2013  Student Artist
haters = people who are jealous.
ReiShiba Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I'll admit that I'm not totally into the overflowing kawaii-style by most people but I was attracted to your art on Youtube and really liked your style, regardless, when I look through your sketch dumps, I really enjoy seeing your improvements. Even you can see the improvements that it's getting better and better each time with structure, concept, and overall style. All of your styles are beautiful because you worked hard for it and no one should be bad mouthed for something that took so much time and effort that they have a passion for.
No one is perfect at drawing because of people's differed preferences but if you look at your followers, they're all here to cheer you on. Whether they are just looking and admiring or even trying to reach your level.
No matter what mistakes you feel that you may make in a piece, it only shows that you know better and will keep it in consideration next time.

I am not pitying you or trying to give you a bunch of sugar coated words just to make you feel better. It's just how I feel as a fellow follower.
Best wishes, Ocean. You have our support.
Sinsofthesea Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
I am so sorry to read about your illness. I know what it's like to suffer bowl obstruction and you are so young! You are an amazingly talented person, I hope that you can learn to let the critiques of people who say nasty things go. Nasty critique that offers no actual constructive criticism is garbage, discard it for exactly what it is. You truly are great at what you do and it's going to illicit allot of envy, people who don't offer a concrete suggestion on way to improve have given you nothing and you should take nothing from their comments and even if they do and feel the need to put a nasty remark in the comment then their advice isn't worth taking.

You keep up the good work, heal, and push on.

Look back on your work 5 years ago, take a deep breath and think five years from now.
Loken-01 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Glad you're healing now, and able to go to loli meets again. Us followers love you and your art xD
It's amazing, and it's you that makes me strive to improve my art (Which is all over the damn place atm).

It's always nice to see your name in my subscriptions. =D

You have been missed!!!!

sparklemaster Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Student General Artist
Oh, I hope you're feeling better by now! Sorry for replying so late. :(
Sorry that some people don't like your art, and that people can be really rude, but at least a lot of people DO like your art. I love your art; it really is beautiful! Don't let others bring you down. :heart:
IchibanDaisuki Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
dear ocean!
i have been a huge fan of your art sinds, i think, 3 hears ago. you improved so much, and you are still improving now. i always enjoy your speedpaint's and livestreams, and i'm sorry to hear abou what you have been going through.
anyway, please remember how many people love your art, and how many more there are who you don't even notice. keep going sweety!!
Mighty-Morphin-Mimi Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2013  Student Filmographer
I'm sorry people suck and about your loss, I hope you get better.
wispwings Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I hope you feel better <3
I love your art! Everyone has mistakes, psh the haters D:
we all gotta start somewhere <3 And I love that u're trying to improve and working hard at it <3 Keep going! I'll be continuing to fan u !! ^-^!
disturbingcalamity Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013
Hey I actually just stumbled onto this account becase you were on the DA page with your before and after meme and I loved the picture. Read this and my heart broke. All of it. Just, wow. New follower, but I genuinely hope you get better and that you will be okay, not just physically but emotionally. That sounds like a lot to be put through, and I can't believe that you've had two doctors fuck up on you, I would be a big ball of raging muffin going skitz on those wanks if it was me.
Also with the haters, I hope that gets somewhat better. Easy to tell someone to ignore them but I know me personally couldn't handle it. You're doing quite well actually. I look forward to seeing your works when you are somehwat better and motivated [:
Erza96 Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Get well oceanchan :heart:

I'm your new follower btw C:
ALegendIsBorn Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
ohmaigod ocean..i hope you'll be better soon..having all those surgeries must be tough, and i think i can even feel your pain just by reading this.. :( I know that you know, you are having a really hard time with all of these rpoblems, and that you know, everything else in life are beginning to become confusing, AND I MEAN EVERYTHING.

I never really experienced the problems you are going through, but every time i read a journal about them having beautiful deviations but they're leaving dA, i feel like, "What is I'm in their situation? What would I do? Would I be the same with them?" and after that, I feel sorry and kind of cry..I'm sensitive..

But anyways, remember that plenty of people still support you, and even if you can't read this comment, I wish that you'll always remember that everything has a reason and that you shouldn't give up

Ilovemybirdie Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Oh my god Ocean D:
I'm sorry about your surgery... please get better.
I really love your art and I'm really inspired by it.
RussiaGermanyFangirl Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I hope you get better soon, I never had surgery but that sounds reaaaalllyyy painful.. Get well soon!
SageMint Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Student General Artist
I honestly think that people should report that blog to have it deactivated. Like many people have said, it really isn't helping anyone improve. It's just mainly used as an unhealthy outlet for people's misplaced anger/or jealousy towards artists.

If the admins cared they would have stopped it. They even have a visible list of artists that shouldn't be confessed about on their blog. Why not just delete the confessions of those artists secretly, instead of throwing that artist under the bus for more ridicule by showing their names? People do not have to know which artists can't be talked about. It continues to make them targets by mentioning their names.

What goes around, comes around. So those people who have caused you(and many others) so much grief and pain will get it back ten-fold, even if this is cyberspace. People fail to realize that the internet is a very permanent extension to your real life. The internet never forgets lol

I hope you make a full, healthy and speedy recovery oceanchan! You are a very talented artist and inspire me a great deal. You are in my positive thoughts and prayers.
Laurezard Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Oh wow.. I'm so sorry to hear that happened to you. I lost my grandfather too, a little over a year ago in January. It was a really tough thing to get through, especially with the things I had going on in my life at the time. It seems like bad things always come at the same time. I know you can make it back from this! I'm glad to hear you're feeling more optimistic about your art again! Even with its flaws, I still think it's beautiful. :heart:
And hey, it takes a lot of time and effort to progress, so don't worry about it!

Wishing you a swift recovery! :hug:
larienne Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Don't give up. I'm amazed how sites like Ac or ED can even exist. All those pages do it spreading hate and frustration. If someone thinks your art has problems, they can come and write it under the picture in a civilized way or even do it in a civilized way there, what's sometimes going on on those pages is ridiculous and I have a feeling it's done by people who are extremely jealous of other individuals and can't get over themselves.. I wish you help and good luck with everything :)
larienne Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
health* not help
JokersWitch Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I wish I'd known about this, Ocean. I feel horrible for this, but, for awhile, I actually was ticked off at you for being gone for so long, but to know that this was the problem? I'm incredibly ashamed, and I just want you to know that I'll always be here in the back rooting for you. I really, truly wish for you to get better. All my compassion is to you now, Ocean. ~A lover of your art and a hopeful friend :']
mild-otaku Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh gosh, I'm so sorry about your health. You're art is adorable and I anticipate it's return. Thank you for sharing and don't let anyone or anything kill you're love for art, it's important, so fight for it. Get better and be proud of yourself when you notice, draw things that make you happy and be happy when you draw them. I guess that's my lame advice. Hope you feel better.
Lothiriell Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Oh god, I have no idea how I'm going to word what I wanna say, but here it is.
I'm going to be honest, although I find your art cute, I'm pretty neutral about it. And also I kinda am from a-c, I mean, I leave a few comments now and then. But please, don't let those comments bring you down. Most people there wouldn't ever try to hurt someone's feelings. Take the constructive criticism to heart, but don't let the assholes get over your head. Believe me, a lot of them don't even know what they're talking about, and post troll comments just for the laugh. I don't remember seeing any drama journal from you, so I admired how well you handled the confessions, I had no idea they were affecting you .-.
I wish you the best of luck on everything! And I know many people on AC also do. I don't know you well, but you seem to have a great personality, and don't deserve to get any of the hate you're getting.
I hope you get better soon :heart:
TheNewWaddedpaper129 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
First off sorry to hear about your hospitalization. I hope you feel better.
On the art level, screw what people say, i may not like the whole Kawaii thing, but i find your art appealing. I've watched your speed paints several times as means of inspiration for my own art and have tried implementing some of your tutorial tricks ( though with some not so fantastic results). You have all the time in the world too improve. Take improving at whatever speed you feel is comfortable and it's like you said you won't improve over night ( hell if you compare the first few issues of Bleach to the more recent you can see that Kubos style has improved).
I hope you feel better and get your confidence back, show them hatters what you're made of.
janzfriend Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Hobbyist
Its okay to be selfish sometimes, go ahead and put yourself on the blacklist. And don't give a shit what anyone has to say about it. Its not about them. Its about your mental and physical health. If it makes you upset, or its to much, then its time to draw the line. No one has the right to tell you how you should feel or how you should handle any situation. Just do what you feel you have to.
And just try to relax and heal sweetie. I hope you get better soon! C:>
eniqua Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Student General Artist
COME BACK!!!! Your art is ADORABLE!!! I hope you feel better!
jemaica Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Student Digital Artist
I couldnt imagine what youre going through, ive been in and out of the hospital myself with a parasite and I know the feeling of being sick of the treatment. You are an inspiration and im glad you are back on DA!
TheBlueMuse Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013
No wonder life's giving you so much shit, considering how talented you are.
Ryuukeru Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Feel Better soon Idol
Sachi-pon Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
i don't even understand why anyone- or even you- would have a problem with your art! it's so good, you are a lot better than so many other people. i don't get what the problem is with your art. it's better than mine... if your art is bad then i don't even know what mine is. XD

oh yeah and i can't stand artist confessions and the pointless hate there. people on that blog just start drama for no reason. people don't realize how much their words hurt others, they think it's no big deal. it's easy to think it's not so bad when you're not the one the words are directed at. and yeah, if you respond to the haters, people say you're "rude" and "whiny." happened to me multiple times. i felt like i was being totally picked apart and everything i did and said was wrong. so i understand how you feel. and i am really sorry about your grandfather. those stupid cowardly artist confession anons had no idea... they don't even think about the struggles someone else may be going through in their life, before they insulted them...

and i am also sorry about your health problems! i would recommend talking to others who have a lot of health problems, in other words, a support group. find people who can understand what you are going through. and i hope you are able to get out of the hospital very soon so you can get back to normal life! :hug:
AppletartBunny107 Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013
I really love your art and so do many others, as you can see. Never let rude criticism or hate destroy your love for doing what you do. People can be absolutely horrible on the internet, and I'm disgusted everyday by internet behavior. Always keep your hope and passion alive. I hope you recover fully back to yourself!
SerenityBomb Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013  Hobbyist
Oh my gosh.
I hope you get better soon.
Ignore the haters. And for the criticism, make it constructive to make your drawings better [although I
haven't notices any flaws on your drawings).
Going thought so much surgeries and crappy doctors, I feel really bad for you.
Get better soon, we miss you!
Canada-chii Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Ocean, hope you're doing better!! ; v ;<3
Project-N25 Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
1) Oh god I've been away for so long as usual. I come back and see this, and feel terrible D:

2) On a more personal note, why is everyone I like getting hospitalized (Not to lump you in with my grandparents ;_; )

3) Now I feel extra-terrible because I'm for sure not able to go to AN13, so if you get in again I still can't give you my monies... (Unless I get into Target. Then I have like a month to horde cash and see if I can pester someone into driving me.

4) Woah, what a medical history. ._. How in the world do doctors screw up that badly? I hope your stay gets better somehow!

5) Wow, the art thing seems like a dilemma with regards to the proper ACs. I can't even offer my own personal strategy on the subject because writing is a different medium, and I'm awfuly sure drawing needs a lot more time and effort than just mindlessly typing out whatever floating around in one's mind. That and it doesn't really work considering you do aim to improve, while the strategy is pretty much a "I care thiiiiiis much" one and thus more for those who feel they're where they want to be. (Or lazy people like me, who are eternally flabberghasted as to why nobody seems to be able to make heads or tails of our writing, while it's perfectly clear to us.)

6) NNNNNGH GET BETTER. NNNNNGH IF I COULD I WOULD SWAP OCEAN. (a) Clears you up, b) you'd probably rather be other places right now, and c) the obligatory selfish I-want-to-skip-exams reason. :3)

And finally, as for that second-last paragraph of yours... It ain't "Fans", it ain't "Followers"...

It's "Friends" silly! :heart:
SamGus Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013
Dont let them destroy you or your art. Ive been watching you for a long time and I love what you do. Your use of colors and mixture of line weights are definately pro. People like to bitch and hate what they dont understand. And I am sure its hard to ignore them when there is a smidgen of truth to some of the hateful shit they spew. It sucks but thats the way life is some times. The best thing to do is remember why you create art work, for whom, and to what extent. In the end, its never been for them, so dont let them get you down.

As for the hospitalization, I went in a few years ago and they thought I had the same problem going down, I was lucky that it was just a false alarm. I cant really imagine how you feel, but I am sorry that you had to go through it. Im glad its over and I hope you have a speedy recovery. Sounds like you have had alot of terrible things happen to you at once, and a little rest from the lime light is definately earned. kick back and enjoy a nice cold soda, watch some cartoons and devour some crunch berries. things will start to pick up here soon.
RB-Illustration Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013   Digital Artist
I've been reading your posts on tumblr but didn't send you any messages because I thought you might have a lot to sort through. I'm really sorry to hear you've been through all this :c When I was younger I had to go up to London a few times for all sorts of tests in the hospital, and even though I never had to stay in hospital, that was bad enough.

AC is a terrible blog sometimes. I don't know why people think it's OK to just go around insulting others. If you don't like their art or think it needs improving, tell them how to improve it. Don't just tell everyone how much you hate it. >__> I don't know how I'd feel if my art turned up on there (though I'm not popular enough for it to, thankfully). I've had anon messages sent to me just saying things like "All your characters look the same," and I just kind of look at them thinking "Why did you feel the need to tell me this? o__o" I know it's probably not much help but remember that for every person who dislikes your art there are thousands of us who love it c:

I hope you feel better soon! :heart:
Murasaki-Shitsuji Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You're a very brave, courageous girl! My applause goes to you, for being able to go through things that many others wouldn't be able to handle. Good luck!
Akimiya Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013
I think all the other comments have probably said it all, but I just wanted to say that you have courage that I will probably never have.
Do your best Ocean! <3
NerdyYuki Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013  Student General Artist
I like your art ;w;, it has a bright warm feeling
I hope you recover soon and get outta the hospital ;u; <3
KitsuneMuffin Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013
Please try to ignore all the trolls... They REALLY ARE JUST JELOUS LITTLE FUCKS. I swear, I mean, how can someone NOT be jealous of your art?!

I hope you get well soon >u<
Dicky-Mint Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013
I love your art and long to see it again. I hope you get well soon too, hospitals are such dangerous places these days, you need to be back home as soon as possible.
All the best. :)
GuineaPiggy Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hi Ocean. I've never commented before, but I've been watching you for a while and you seem like a really nice person. It's a shame rude people have affected you this much, but I totally understand and I'm very sorry about what happened. I know everyone needs improvement in some areas, but I also want to say, please don't stop drawing what you love. No one's perfect and I'm sure your fans (including myself) will love whatever you come out with next, and I think most of us know improvement takes a lot of time. And if there are times you don't want to draw at all, that's okay, too. Take care of yourself first.

I wish you the best, and I hope you get better (emotionally and physically). Your art is still beautiful and if you wish to take it to the next level, by all means do so...only as long as you enjoy doing it :) Take care~
CottonCandyCoockie Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm really happy to hear you won't quit and that your mother and boyfriend helped you through all this. D:
Really, I wish you the best ! You're such an inspiring person
AravisDeistery Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Just so you know, your art is awesome. I may not follow you a lot right now but just know that you made my art what it is today. I am not a big artist on DA but I'm really proud to say that I have one popular drawing made with what I learned from you.
Yes the colors you use are bright and you may not have a very definite light source. But this is your style and this is what makes your art unique.

I am very thankful to you for teaching me how to color my art.

I even won third place in a contest. here's the link, it may cheer you up because THIS drawing is something I made from your knowledge

I really hope you'll feel better. I hope you'll get out of the hospital soon...
randomX5 Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013
Feel better!~ <3 ; 3;
tehto Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013
Keep on truckin' gurl frann.
kylekiller Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Professional Writer
Ocean! You just worry about feeling better for now! One day you'll be able to look back and laugh about that red-neck bitch you share a room with!
JadeKrystal Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Student General Artist
Ocean - there will be another good day. We are still here for you, even if you're not up to posting art. Feel better soon! :hug:
KanraKami Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Student Filmographer
First off I will say that what's been going on recently really does suck.
But I hope you can try to not focus on your 'terrible luck' and all that. What I mean to say is that I hope you can look at all the positive stuff instead, like Ichi and your mom, and the fact that you have people in your life that care so much about you and love you.

As for the art part of it. Seriously. Don't even sweat it until you're better. I know art is a huge part of your life, believe me, I know, but the most important thing right now is your health. And I'm sure, the less stressed you are and the more happy you are, the faster you'll feel better.

You're young, you have /plenty/ of time to get better at art, I feel the same negativity sometimes, feeling like I'm not good enough. But you can't let other people tell you that you aren't good enough. It's not up to them how good or bad you are, and if they're gonna hate on you than let them hate, and don't let them bring you down. Everyone learns and grows at their own pace, hell I'm sure plenty of the trolls out there can't even draw stick figures.

So buck up and get better, live your life being happy, and don't let the things people say hurt you, you know what you need to do, so they can fuck off.

And for what it's worth, I think your art is lovely, flaws and all.
Dark-Lighting Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013
Aww, I really do hope you get better quickly! :iconyuiglompplz: Your art is wonderful, of course. You have room for learning, but there is never a perfect. :iconbrohugplz: Believe in yourself!
ruuiisu Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I really do hope you get to feeling better Ociii~
Please don't worry about us at the moment. Your health life should come first. After all, we will be here whenever you're up and ready. Until then, take care, for I will truly miss you while you do. :iconluvluvplz:

Your "fan",
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